The Servant by Roger Canals
Word Count: 5000 words
Critique Date: 16 June 2026, In Person
Author Email: rc************@***il.com
Content warnings:
Abuse, Blood, Child sexual abuse, Classism, Disregard for personal autonomy (kidnapping / enslavement / abduction), Rape / Sexual Assault (or attempted), Sexism / Misogyny, Violence (gratuitous / extreme)
Author Notes:
This is the first chapter of the dark fantasy book I’m in the process of re-drafting. Being the first chapter I’m conscious of the fact that it needs to hook the reader, so I’d like to know if I’m managing to do so.
- Is the story interesting? Does it pace well?
- Is the theme a little too dark?
- Are the characters believable, and do their dialogues along with their accents and dialects work?
- Is the main character likeable?
- Does it leave you wanting to read more?
Ultimately I’d like to know what works and what doesn’t.
Thanks!
Submitted: 4 January 2026
Last updated: 5 July 2026 at 23:05 by Jane Morecroft